Rev. Jeremiah Wright to Run for President

The ever energetic and master self promoter Rev Jeremiah Wright announced today in Chicago that not only would he run but that he would be the next President of the United States.

While Rev. Wright’s announcement was a shock to everyone it does explain the round of public appearances that Rev Wright has recently made, such as the keynote speaker address before the NAACP convention and his red hot performance at the National Press Association event in Washington.

When asked what made him decide to run against Hillary Clinton, John McCain, and his long time former friend Barrack Obama Rev. Wright said that “God encouraged him to do it. And with God’s help I can not lose. No way. So one way or another you had better get used to a black man in the White House right now. And that black man will be me so help me God”.

When asked by stunned reporters what his first act in office would be the unflappable Rev. replied that “I will move the White House to where it should have been in the first place which is Chicago. Why should I have to move to the snake pit of Washington, D.C. when as President I can move the White House to any place that I please.”

When this was announced the reporters suddenly excused themselves and urgently ran to the bathrooms to throw up. The national press corp loves Washington. All their favorite bars are located there.

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